Last Monday we said farewell to a group of parents who have in common the fact that they are all separated and/or divorced and have children. Most have come by themselves although two of the group had come with their former partners. The size of the group is usually around 15 in number and we have been lucky in attracting a roughly 50/50 male/female split.
So what are these Parenting After Parting groups about? The process of separation and divorce is a difficult experience for all and many parents are concerned about the impact of their separation upon their children. Seminars (two, 2 hour evening meetings at our offices in Covent Garden) are run by Ruth Smallacombe and Dominic Raeside, both highly experienced mediators and child consultants who have specialised in the area of working with parents and children in the context of separation/divorce for over 20 years. Parents attending have the opportunity to ask questions specific to their particular circumstances, although there is no requirement for group participation and those attending can quietly take the information in without actively participating. The presenters hope, however, that each parent attending will find something that they can take away from the workshops which will have a positive impact upon their children.
The content covers the emotional and statistical information around the process of separation and divorce and specifically aims to offer new ideas, a sense of hope, provide a sense of validation for parents, all with the intention of helping children to thrive in what is often a difficult transition for them. Having looked at the emotional impact, we also look at the legal alternatives, including mediation, collaborative law and litigation and the group is shown two video clips from Christina McGee’s programme for Channel 4 entitled “How to divorce without screwing up the kids”.
The second evening covers topics like tips for managing relationships with family and friends, how to talk to children about divorce, listening to children and more specific information relating to children at different ages and stages in their psychological development. Finally, the second evening finished with information about new relationships, remarriage and stepfamilies.
The feedback from Parenting After Parting courses has been very positive. Parents attending have enjoyed meeting other parents in “the same boat” and many have commented that it is interesting to hear the opposite gender’s view (father or mother) when it is not coming from the mouth of their ex! Many parents attending have said that they would like more and whilst there is not enough time to cover all the subjects in detail, we hope that all those attending take away something that will positively impact on their children.
Family Law in Partnership run the workshops (free for FLiP clients) every 2-3 months. However, Parenting After Parting courses are also held at the Coram Centre in London and at other venues across England (for further details see www.resolution.org.uk).
Contact info@flip.co.uk for further information about the FLiP courses.
Tags: children, divorce, separation