Getting divorced or separating from a partner is a difficult and often painful business even if you are the one who has initiated the split. There are a lot of mixed emotions ranging from anger to relief and many in between.  Sometimes it is all very confusing and you simply cannot think clearly. This is at a time when you are being expected to make important decisions and, where necessary, provide adult support for your children.

 Here are some ideas of things that you can do to help you clear your head and provide you with the support you need:

• Keep in touch with your close friends and, where possible, discuss some of the decisions you have to make with them.
• Arrange to see your GP and find out what support services they offer.
• Find out about counselling or other therapeutic services offered locally or through your lawyers. Sometimes having someone to talk to who does not know you or your family can be very liberating.
• Check out on the internet or in your local library some of the resources that are available to help people in your position – for example Resolution (www.resolution.org.uk) , One Plus One (www.oneplusone.org.uk), Gingerbread (www.gingerbread.org.uk), Parent Line (www.parentlineplus.org.uk) and Relate (www.relate.org.uk) . There are many others.
• Give yourself permission to be upset and angry – these are very normal reactions.
• But at the same time give yourself permission to start enjoying life again. Build some “me” time into your week.
• Try not to do too much at once when it comes to sorting out the practicalities of the relationship breakdown. Take the trouble to look after yourself physically. Try and eat and sleep properly as you will need to do these things to keep your energy levels up.

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Tags: divorce, self help, separation

This entry was posted on Friday, February 5th, 2010 at 9:35 am and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.